Fish kisses

Sometimes I feel like Im a fish swimming quickly to the surface for a breath of life to releave the stress of holding my breath when I hit something.

I hit a clear window just before I get to the surface. It doesn't allow me to get to the clear blue sky that I can see through the window just before air above the water. I know if I could just get past it I would breathe again easily and have some relief.

Yet again I have to keep holding my breath sitting there waiting for that window to open. It seems like a cruel joke of God for that window to be clear because it lets me see the world above that could releave me just above the waters I'm swimming in.

It holds me back. It's hard to be so close to see through the water, through the window and have to turn back realizing the window isn't open for me to swim through so I can catch my breath. I just have to keep holding my breath swimming and praying that I have the breath and strength inside me to keep swimming.

As I am at my last swimming and feeling exhausted and weary is when I realize that I have to pray for the breath of God to breathe new life into me. I can't survive on my own as a fish in this sea. Maybe it's all about stopping swimming and just being still looking for that spirit of God to give me some mouth to mouth resitation.

Only a God who loves me would kiss this fish with a breath of life and give it away without any cost. Jesus never ceases to amaze me. He sits calmly by while we are swimming just patiently waiting for us to stop and embrace the peace He has for us.

Fruit: Peace
Song in my head: Savior Please - Josh Wilson

Verse: Luke 24:41 - 40When he had said this, he showed them his hands and feet. 41And while they still did not believe it because of joy and amazement, he asked them, "Do you have anything here to eat?" 42They gave him a piece of broiled fish, 43and he took it and ate it in their presence.

On the dock with Jesus

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to lay down at the end of a dock to stare at the Stars on a clear night with a real live breathing Jesus laying right next to you admiring them too?

I hadn't even fathomed this thought tell I read it recently in a book I have been reading called "The Shack". I can't give away the plot but I have to say that this thought of a simple time admiring the beauty of a clear night of stars with God in the flesh next to me sounded wonderful.

I love nature and love how it just proves to me how beautiful God must be to have created it. The thought of a live living breathing Jesus to hug and smile right in the flesh next to me sounded like such a treasure. I wonder what it must have been like for the apostles who got to hug Him every day.

The touch of God can be so real sometimes it feels like it is in the flesh but there is something to that warm feel of a hug from a person. I think God must use people to be His arms here on earth but I still think in awe of the thought of what it would have been like to get a human hug from an earthly Jesus right here on earth.

It is like friends that are far away. You can talk on the phone but it is something more when you can look into their eyes so that you can see into their lives and hearts.

I know that Jesus isn't far away even if we can't physically touch Him. Yet I still think it would be nice to be laying down next to Him staring at the stars and asking "so why did you create that one?" or some other silly question that He could smile and answer with "because I am God".

Fruit: JOY
Song in my head: Sitting On The Dock Of The Bay Lyrics - Otis Redding
Verse:Psalm 46: 10 "Be still, and know that I am God;

Looking for something...

Do you ever feel like you need to go to work to find rest from the weekend? I felt like that Sunday night. I had a full weekend where I felt drained from it. Even praying I thought "are they even my words...?"

What happened?... I had to ask myself as I realized I was feeling down at work this Monday morning. Waking up this morning I had full intention to look ahead with my opening prayer for it to be a day I reasoned better in comparison to the weekend.

I had wondered how my decisions from this weekend could have kept me from a blessing. I had tried to let that go knowing a compassionate God could forgive my indecison that led to my choices.

I could name some seemingly silly endless list of things that had gone wrong over the weekend to the sheer embarrassment of my weakness I wouldn't share not wanting to be seen as a complainer which makes me almost never complain.

However... there were several little inconviences and stupid decisions that I made over the weekend that had me feeling like I wished God had made me different. It is hard to be flawed and human.

Sometimes I just wish I could be an angel. I had opened up with a prayer for the day today like I usually do but it just went downhill from there. I had tried to turn it around.

I had gotten a full nights sleep for the first time this weekend. I had fully prepared with a shower Sunday night. I had put my clothes out ready to jump into the morning groove. I thought I had done everything in my power that I could to make my day start out to be one where I was ready to start off the week on a positive note.

What had I forgotten? Where had I gone wrong? My weekend rebellion from what I could have done to accomplish things as to what I wanted to do as to what I should have done as to what I actually did made me see I need to start trusting my instincts more.

I realized that it is my true instincts that I need to trust and not let those ones that try to creep in creep. My true instincts come from the spirit of God inside me. That other instinct of a sinful nature only creeps in to try and steal or destroy my peace when I let it.

I have to listen to that still small little voice amidst the crowd telling me what is right for me to do. I just need to just DO THE NEXT RIGHT THING and not worry so much about the future and I need to LISTEN to the voice of reason.

I found that next right thing I was searching for once I started looking in the right place. I found my peace when I studied Ephesians reading Pauls prayer like it was a prayer for me.

A Prayer for the Ephesians Eph 3:14For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15from whom his whole family in heaven and on earth derives its name. 16I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. 20Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen

It's Gods love that takes me back and turns my weakness into strength, my mourning into dancing and my attitude around. It is only when I choose to do the next right thing in His direction that I find fulfullment and joy.

So in those times when I am reaching for something feeling empty needing something but just can't figure out what will bring me peace I have to remember that a gentle love from God is there for me.

I just need to look for it instead of what the world would tell me to. I need to look in that great book God gave us to give us those answers and peace we are searching everywhere in the world for but can find if we simply seek Him first.

Fruit: Gentleness

Song in my head: As the Deer

Verse: Ephesians 3:18may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

I've Got The Joy Joy Joy... Where?

Finding Joy in this day and age can be difficult at times so in those rare moments that Joy just reaches up and grabs you it's important to remember to let it.

On the way to work this morning Spirit 105.3 Radio station just really hit home. Every song they played from 6am to 7am on my way to work just blessed my socks off. Of course I wouldn't want my socks off due to that chilly morning air but just loved a wonderful joyful time of worship.

They played...
Josh Wilson - Savior, Please
Tree63 - Blessed Be Your Name
Jars Of Clay - Love Song For A Savior
Matthew West - Something To Say
Laura Story - Mighty To Save
Newsboys - I'm Not Ashamed
David Crowder Band - Wholly Yours
Third Day - Call My Name
Chris Tomlin - Indescribable

It was awesome with some great Kid stories mixed it. I am so blessed by Spirit 105.3 sometimes when it just hits the spot. Worship takes you back and turns you around to see the creator instead of yourself. It's something beautiful that can't be measured.
Fruit: JOY
Song in my head: Something Beautiful - Newsboys - I've got the Joy
Verses: Psalm 94:19 When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul. Psalm 95:1 Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD; let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation Psalm 96:12 let the fields be jubilant, and everything in them. Then all the trees of the forest will sing for joy; Psalm 97:11 Light is shed upon the righteous and joy on the upright in heart. Psalm 98:4 Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth, burst into jubilant song with music; Psalm 98:6 with trumpets and the blast of the ram's horn— shout for joy before the LORD, the King. Psalm 98:8 Let the rivers clap their hands, Let the mountains sing together for joy;

Dancing with God

Turn me around Lord I'm not looking at you, I keep turning in the wrong direction. Teach me how to dance.

Wisk me off my feet. Grab my hand and pull me close. Lead me on the dance floor.

Hold me tight and spin me fast making the world a blur. I will spin so fast that all I can see is you.

Let me see what you want me to see. Help me to be what you want me to be.

Then slow me down so I can rest. Turning slowly I can see. I can see your best right before me.

Fruit: Joy

Song in my Head: Savior King

Verse: Matthew 22:37 Love the Lord your God with all of your heart, with all of your mind and with all of your strength

Seeing through her eyes

Have you ever found pen in your possession and wondered how in the world you got it? I get so busy sometimes I forget where I pick things up. I found a pen in my purse while paying at the grocery store and wondered where I got it today. Everyday we have little things that happen to us that we could miss if we don't stop and look around once and awhile.

There are so many little everyday things we do as we go throughout the day that can seem like meaningless parts of our existance. I drove to the store walked around looking for that one thing I came for but ended up finding some other things and got in line. Then I ended up in line remembering what I actually came for and got out of line to go to get it.

On a mission to get that one last thing I bumped into the cart of the elderly woman who was not in the slightest bit of a hurry. Her beautiful weathered face smiled as she saw me rushing when I said "exuse me". I walked on quickly but as I got into my car I thought later of her face as she smiled looking after me. I thought of how she must be remembering her days of being younger and in a hurry.

She must have thought "if they only knew they would slow down and look around". We need to look around to see that woman who is lonely needing someone to just take the time to say hello and invest just a bit of Gods love into her.

Thinking of one of my favorite songs lately by Brandon Heath I hummed a bit... "give me your eyes so I can see... all that I have been missing... give me your love for humanity.."

I was thinking of this elderly woman out there in the supermarket with her eyes reaching out looking for companionship. There are alot of lonely people in the world who don't have a loving God to fill that need inside.

We just have to take the time to stop, slow down and reach out. We have been given so much love from God and have so much to give. There are so many who need it. We need to give it away everyday even in our hurried moments because truely there are no meaningless parts to our exsistance. Each act of the day matters to a God who cares for us as much as we should care for others.

Fruit: Love

Song in my head: All the Loney People - Beatles & Give me your eyes- Brandon Heath

Verse: Psalm 68: 5 A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. 6 God sets the lonely in families, he leads forth the prisoners with singing;