The Wedding Ring Scar

My pastor shared a story last weekend about a scar he had that reminded him of an answered prayer and I was inspired to rethink my scar. I decided I needed to love my scar and not be ashamed of it and see it for what it is. Its an outward sign of a inward change still on my finger to remind me of how very far I have come. It's a sign of how powerful God is.

I was divorced 3 years ago and when I took off my wedding ring about 3 1/2 years ago I had a severe wound underneath my ring. Let me tell you how it got there.

When I got married I was hurting from childhood abuse and fear. I was always overweight growing up and was still very heavy at the time my ex husband and I got married.

Because food was my choice for coping with life I gained over 150 pounds during my 10 year marriage while dealing with a husband who had an addiction and who worked as a missionary and for the church during our marriage.

Even though my ex husband was an addict I was willing to fight for our marriage and never ever wanted to give up. My ex-husband decided that he wanted something different than what he had promised on our wedding day. He didn’t want God or me anymore and so our divorce became final 3 years ago this month.

I gained so much weight during the marriage and since my ring had never been sized up it was literally wounding me. I was so determined during the marriage to never ever take my ring off that it had dung into my skin and created a deep scar where the ring had been. When I finally had gotten it off 3 1/2 years ago it had bled and blistered leaving a deep indentation and scar.

It seemed like this scar would never heal as I waited for it to. The first year after my divorce I went to God and repented of my food addiction and lost over 100 pounds and then over the last two years I have lost over 100 more.

Still this whole time the scar from my ring hasn’t disappeared completely. It’s very faded and probably only I know it is there but I kept praying. God take away my scar so I’m not scarred forever as a woman divorced.

Then this last weekend when I heard my pastor sharing of how he was proud of his scar I really felt God whisper to me not to be ashamed of my scar. It’s a huge testimony of the healing He has done in me. He has healed me but left some of my scar for just awhile longer than I had wanted to help me remember how very far I have come.

By His stripes we are healed and I know my scar will go away completely someday or I will get another ring to cover it but I realized I need to think differently of it. I think from now on when I look down I am going to smile and remember how Gods love has healed me and not about the place I came from because that is just history. I want to dance in the freedom I know now. Dance with me and love your scars because they are just a testimony of the power of an awesome God who loves us right where we are at.

Fruit: Peace

Song in my head: History; Matthew West

Verse: Psalm 30:2 O LORD my God, I called to you for help and you healed me.